Tuesday, May 05, 2009
10:08 PM
seriously. i cant stand it anymore. its really going over my patience.
i am already having a hard time pushing myself to study and to pracitce for my emaths paper 2 tmr. i am seriously HAVING NO MOTIVATION OR PRESSURE AT ALL for this prelim 1 exams.
my friends can keep encouraging me. saying things like jiayou! lets do it together. encouraging me about God's presence. simply just their presence there with me and i feel encouraged. maybe this is the reason why i like studying outside with friends. there is aircon. each time i feel like giving up,people will be there to encourage me. asking me not to give up and thus i will know that i am never alone in this. God's word,the bible,is a tower of refuge. each time i am discouraged,i can find encouragements from there. each time i am stressed,i can find peace.

but it also made me wonder. why am i always angrered easily in the family?
seriously. i dunno whattheheck had gone into my parents' brains. PMS i suppose. and my dad has a BIG SERIOUS ONE. a great freaking mood swing.
sat i bought bubbletea back wanting to let my parents try. i bought it,quench my thirst,and didnt drink it anymore. solely for a good intention: TO LET THEM TRY.
but the first thing i stepped into the door, my dad started freaking scolding me. "How many times must i tell you. late already dont drink all these rite! they gt high sugar content. say so many times still dont listen!" then freak attitude me. i said"thirsty mahs" he went like" thirsty thirsty. cannot come home then drink isit. always drink all these." i said." no lorh. where gt everytime drink. i very long didnt drink already can!"which is like very true because i was fasting from bubbletea earlier on. then he say" i count also know that you drink bubbletea almost everyday. dont think i dunno" i was like thinking WHATTHEHECK! he think he my dad he really know me the best meh. my own life that i am leading,jollywell i know it the BEST. freak him man.

i think swine flu is the damn greatest problem that is stirring up all these trouble.
i dont like to eat the things,i throw they scold
i already have NO MOTIVATION ALREADY RITE. i am feeling hungry. hungry like NOW! so i just went to the kitchen there to get the box of biscuits. eat already then can replenish brain energy to eat what. then i was about to walk into the room when my dad went like" GIRL,YOU BETTER STOP EATING ALL THESE OKAY. IN THESE KIND OF WEATHER AND SEASON YOU CANNOT EAT THIS." LIKE WHATTHEHECK LA. freak leh. i was abt to have motivation to do my maths after eating then what he do?! kill my motivation. great luh. then if i no mood. tmr i flunk my paper. what will happen. NAGGINGS SCOLDINGS will be coming! freak them man!!!!


there isnt any joy.
there isnt any fruitfulness.
GOD! ITS TIME FOR A REVIVAL!!!!
but how?


can somebody tell me how?!


i cant get rid of their mood swings.
i know i can choose my response towards this matter.
sorry God,i chose the wrong one.
but,
I REALLY CANT STAND IT!
give me patience.
patience patience is ultimately the key thing that i gt to have now.


just dunno whats in all these adults brain.
youths are gonna change the world!
change all these stupid mindsets of adults. of parents.

live my life for only one audience.
the one who then truly knows me BEST.
the one who then truly knows me INSIDE OUT.
the one that will NOT ASSUME.
the one that knows how many strands of hair i have.
the one that knows my TRUE FEELINGS
the one that knows my TRUE THOUGHTS.
the one that gives me COMFORT
the one that gives me PEACE.
the one who ENCOURAGES.
the one who LIFTS me UP when i am down instead of pulling me down further.

yes God,i know that's You.
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Hello.
i am CHRYSTAL!((:. I am not PERFECT, but I am accepted for who I am
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I am CHILD OF GOD and proud to be one Y-HOPE! East,East BC and EB3!<3are my loves!
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